Sunday, May 15, 2005

Boy Toy Update

It's 4:00 and the *boy toy* hasn't called regarding the Willie concert this evening so I'm calling that a no-show. Top 10 possible reasons he didn't make the call:

Reason number 10(a): He lost my number.

Reason number 10(b): I accidentally gave him the wrong number. My bad.

Reason number 9: The girlfriend he allegedly broke up with 2 weeks ago is not aware of the fact that they are broken up and will be in my seat in Section V watching Willie. Enjoy.

Reason number 8: He's a goofball.

Reason number 7: He never saw me in the daylight and he never saw me before he had consumed a few cocktails so he's fearing *coyote ugly syndrome*, especially since I'm an *older woman*. (If you'll pardon my arrogance, the joke's on him on that one.)

Reason number 6: The fact that he spent $80 for the tickets didn't impress me enough to have sex with him Friday night so he's thinking his chances would have been pretty slim tonight also. (Good guess.)

Reason number 5: He forgot about the concert (see Reason number 8).

Reason number 4: Family emergency (*Uh, my dog died?*)

Reason number 3: Previously mentioned *former* girlfriend (see Reason number 9) kicked his ass when she heard about the hot babe he was hustling Friday night. (That would be ME, people. Stop laughing.)

Reason number 2: The friend who was with him Friday night has threatened to blackmail him with said *former* girlfriend and the friend will be sitting in Section V enjoying Willie tonight.

Reason number 1: The rocket scientist lost the tickets.

13 comments:

Jack said...

Reason #1 won't work. I lost my tickets too (this was originally scheduled for May, afterall). All it took was an e-mail to Ticketmaster to have replacements waiting at the will call window.

Jack said...

But I don't suppose a Call to Ticketmaster would work if he bought them from Bonnie after she won them at a trivia contest.

Nevermaind.

Anonymous said...

WOW...I pimped my sister out Friday night, made $80.00 and she still gets to stay home and watch "House Wives". I can now afford a hair cut for me and my cocker spaniel. (Different shops. I dont think I'd look that good with a flat top and hairy legs. Who knows somebody out there may like that) We're thinking about going to see Earl Thomas Conley Friday Night. Free concert at one of my saloons. Better bring her with me. I need money for books for the fall semester

Baby Sister Bonnie

Laurie said...

Wang - He called at around 5:30 p.m. saying he lost my number and just found it (Reason 10a). Far too late considering he said he would call Saturday.

Bonnie - Earl Thomas Conley? I shall do my best to get you those books, baby sister.

Jack said...

Too bad. You missed a great show. Not that I'd rub it in or anything.

Laurie said...

Wang - You're killing me here!

Mommy said...

Aw, damn! What a dumbass!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Reason No. 0: He was a fig newton of your imagination.

Reason No. -1. He realized you're too good for him.

John Norton said...

Hey, I saw ol' Willie at the Fox Theater in Hanford just a couple weeks ago. It was indeed a very good show. After reading Wang's post I wish I would have stayed around after it seemed like it was over the first time.

I remember when he did "On the Road Again" and "Always On My Mind," (his two biggest songs) thinking "Wow, it's only been an hour and he's about to quit already." But then he went for another 45 minutes with old country standards and some gospel stuff. So that was cool.

And yes, camera phones SUCK!

Lorna said...

Reason Number 237: He knew he was outclassed, his friend was outclassed and his former girlfriend was WAY outclassed. And just maybe, Willie is overrated. Oh God, I take that back, I take it back.

Laurie said...

Jen T - He actually seemed totally shocked when I told him I just thought he had changed his mind and that I didn't have time to get ready. I'm feeling kind of bad about it now.

Old Horsetail - Ain't you just the sweetest thang!

John - Sounds like you might have missed some of the best stuff.

Lorna - No takey-backseys! And, it takes class to know class. :)

sleepybomb said...

in his case, it is rocket surgeon, or is it brain scientist. . .
anyways,
i bet we'd have a blast runnin' out and about!

Laurie said...

Sleepy - I think we could definitely do some damage in the French Quarter!