Friday, November 29, 2013

Black Friday - Shop on!

I'm not a Black Friday type person, but people are so judgy, judgy toward the people who are. For some of the Black Friday shoppers, that IS how they spend their family time and it's been a family tradition long before it was labeled "Black Friday." Sure, there are crazies out there, but there are crazies everywhere. 

We also need to consider the fact that not everybody likes their family, so, there's that.

Some Black Friday shoppers just have such competitive personalities, that they can't help themselves. So, shop on, you crazy diamonds (Pink Floyd reference). I'm staying in my pajamas.

Monday, October 14, 2013

Separate Checks: Is it really THAT big of a deal?

I understand that asking for separate checks from a restaurant/server's standpoint is probably a pain in the ass.  However, in this day of computers, shouldn't that be an easy task?  We, as patrons, know the paying out process will take longer and we don't care, but is it really that difficult to separate checks and get the checks right?  Maybe it is.

Then, there's the issue of one person paying the whole bill (sometimes for a bunch of people he barely knows) who then has a huge debit on his credit card and a pocket full of cash from being reimbursed that he didn't really want to be carrying around the rest of the night.

Especially in a tourist town (hello, New Orleans), separate checks shouldn't be that big of a deal?  Right?  Maybe I'm a peasant and don't understand how the rich people do things, but us normal people would like to not be treated like we're asking too much of the world by requesting separate checks.

Wednesday, October 09, 2013

"Not the livestock, George!"

I was talking to my mom on the phone today and she told me she is going to a bible study class and had no idea there was so much sex in the bible.

She said, "It's intercourse this and intercourse that. They call it intercourse. I don't know how they had time to take care of all their cows and their sheep."

I said, "Well, I guess they didn't have anything else to do in those days."

"Yeah," she said, "But this guy was Jacob. He had a LOT of cows and sheep. A lot! No way he had time to take care of all those cows and sheep."

"Plus," she said, "All those kids and wives! Sex, sex, sex."

We spoke a little longer, then she said, "Gotta go. Gotta go read my sex book."
 — with Ruby Courville Ransonette.

Sweet Dreams are Made of These

I was babysitting the kids the other night and I told my six year old granddaughter it was her bedtime.

She said, "Grandma, tonight I want you to put me to bed after I pass out. Do you know what 'pass out' means? It means that I can't even keep my eyes open and can hardly move anymore."

I said, "No, we can't do that tonight. It's a school night."

As I was walking her to her bedroom, she sadly and quietly said, "But, I wanted to pass out."

I feel you, sister.

Sunday, October 06, 2013

Les Paw Mewsic Series

Saw a great show last night at The Les Paw Mewsic Series. This is my friend Steve Elliott's house which he has turned into a live music venue by putting church pews in his den. How cool is that? I will alert all of you for the next show. It's a wonderful place to hear great music. Last night was Drew Kennedy and it was a fantastic show. Can't wait for the next one!

As an extra added bonus, Donnie Courville brought some of Bigrich Courville's indescribable gumbo! Eat your hearts out, people, especially you John Cowan.

Website:  The Les Paw Mewsic Series

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Couch to 5k - Yacht Rock Version

My toes have been unbruised for a while and fall is in the air (it was only 91 degrees yesterday), so I think I'll try this Couch to 5k thing again.

I've changed my music selection from upbeat and manic to "yacht rock" which is a surprisingly good choice for me.  I thought wild-dance-rock-pop music would inspire me to keep moving, but after jogging to "yacht rock," I find I'm much more suited to a leisurely jog than a rockin' jog.  Plus, the tunes make me feel like I'm in a romantic comedy and Tom Hanks or Billy Crystal will be around the next corner waiting to fall in love with me in a romantically comedic sort of way.

Footnote:  On my jogging route back to my house there was an abandoned athletic shoe insole lying in the street.  I imagined some poor bastard running along in pain, stopping, pulling off his shoe, yelling "Gotdammit!" and throwing the offending insole to the ground.  I predict an angry insole throwing in my future as karma for being amused at the plight of the unidentified insole abusing runner.

Saturday, August 31, 2013

Low T - Get over it

"I have low testostrone, there I said it."

That's the opening line for one of those annoying Androgel commercials.  Men have always made jokes about women and menopause.  Now, they discover they also have hormone issues as they age and it's all "Yeah?!  So what?!  You wanna say something about it?"

They can't even call it "male menopause."  They have to give it a name in an attempt to disguise their insecurity about their lowered hormone level.

I imagine this pitch meeting by the Mad Men who came up with this marketing campaign:  "Let's not mention testosterone or, God forbid, male menopause.  How about 'Low T?'  Yeah, that's it. That's suitably evasive."

"That's when I talked to my doctor.  He gave me some blood tests.  Showed it was 'Low T.'  That's it. It was a number."

It wasn't just "a number," fella.  It was LOW testerone.  Get over yourself.

Thursday, June 27, 2013

Big Brother 15

Andy = Gollum

McCrae = Megamind

UPDATE - 7/8/2013 !!!

How quickly things change.

At this point, I like Judd, Helen and Howard.

McCrae is okay, but the Amanda connection is annoying.

I like Andy, but he's beginning to be too hyper all over the place.   He needs to scam some of Aaryn's Adderall.

Elissa is a hot mess and I would really like to meet her and Rachel's parents.  I have questions.

Spence is, in Big Brother House terms, a shady fuck.

There is nothing I can say about Jeremy and Aaryn that has not already been said.  Evil incarnate.

Kaitlin is less evil, but still incarnate by association.

Gena Marie is a tad schizo, but she is who she is and I can appreciate that.

Nick could go all the way, but it's way too early in the season for all the shenanigans happening in this house to be able to pick a winner.

I don't like Candice and Jessie just on the basis of general unlikeableness.


Original Post - 6/27/2013

I didn't like the Jersey/New York blonde chick (GinaMarie) until I watched some BB After Dark.  Seemed like a normal person.

The Beaumont girl (Jessie) who was so annoying on the show, hardly said anything “after dark,” so I don’t know what to think about her.  Did not like her at all on the show.

“After Dark” on TVGN censors the cursing which is very distracting, so I don’t think I’ll be watching it much.

The girl who was the most annoying on the “After Dark” portion was the real estate agent chick (Amanda).  Would not shut up.  

Everyone else was really normal and likable, which surprised me.  At this early stage, I'm usually ready to evict half the cast immediately.

LOVE Rachel’s sister (Elissa)!

Sunday, June 02, 2013

Couch to 5k - REVISED New Plan

Injured my right pinkie toe while packing for a weekend trip. No outdoor walking or running for the foreseeable future.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Dance Walking Fitness Ben Aaron. Time to Dance Walk Baby

This is the absolute best thing I have seen in a long time...

Couch to 5k - New Plan

Years ago, in the olden days, when my 32 (!!) year old son was a toddler, I knelt down hard on a Lego.  Since that day, my right knee occasionally bothers me, but I can always figure out the problem and work around it.  I even live in a townhouse with stairs and have no problems until I try to be overly ambitious in my stride while walking the streets.  I mean, while walking the neighborhood.

However, I can't seem to work around the knee pain with this running thing and I'm far to cheap to go to a sports doctor or a really good athletic shoe store at this time.  So, due to my knee taking longer and longer between runs to stop aching and my desire to not fall down because of a weak knee while toting a grandchild or a margarita, I am putting Couch to 5k on hiatus.

Instead of Couch to 5k three days a week, I will be walking or using my glider/walker five days a week using the "free run" portion of the app throwing in short bursts of runs here and there. After my knee pain is gone and I've built up my leg muscles and maybe lost 10-ish pounds, I'll give it another go.

This is not defeat!  It is de-knee.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Couch to 5K - Day 4 and Day 5

Day 4 was done on my "air walker," so it doesn't really count, but it's better than nothing.

Day 5 was done this evening and I'm having some pain in my right knee.  I bought a knee brace that helped a little, but I'll try the other knee brace I bought when I run again Thursday.

I only ran about 2/3 of the running parts, so I think I'll repeat week two again next week.  Slow and steady for me.

Nothing special to report regarding people/animal/music, except for the cute guy who set his water sprinklers so they hit the street a little giving me a cool little break on the way out and on the way back home.  Thanks, dude.

Friday, May 24, 2013

Couch to 5K - Day 3... - Success!

For the first time, I jogged all the running parts without stopping.  I felt like Rocky.  I did stop jogging prematurely at one point, but that was only because I thought a guy introducing B. B. King on my playlist was my zombie trainer telling me it was time to "walk it out."

I also stopped long enough for an old guy in his yard to explain to me that the multitude of squirrels in his yard were there because there was a baby...and a momma...or that big tree over there.  I have a feeling I'm in for a lot more of these conversations, if he's keeping track of my running routine.

Today's music mishap occurred when "What's New Pussycat?" repeated itself.  As I mentally prepared myself for a third replay, ZZ Top's "Pearl Necklace" played.  Sweet.  That's what's new, pussycat.

Couch to 5K - Day 2...Again - Air Walker/Glider

Didn't get home until 9:30 p.m. tonight, so did my "Couch to 5K" on my air walker.  Nothing to report.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Couch to 5K - Day 1...Again - Two Bras One Girl

I'm repeating Week 1 this week, since I don't feel like I did Week 1 justice last week.  I jogged about twice as much as I did last week, so I'm glad I'm repeating.  I'm not running as much as my zombie trainer wants me to run, but he'll have to be patient.

At the recommendation of one of my runner friends, I wore two bras while running this evening:  one sport bra and one regular bra. That was a good suggestion and worked great.  When I got home, The Bazingas couldn't wait to bounce free.  Ah, sweet relief.

Today's wildlife theme for the run was gnats and cats.  Cats glared at me from a distance and gnats did their in-your-face gnatty thing at me.  Annoying.

To show you how out of character a running program is for me, my mom asked my sister why I was lying on Facebook and telling people I was running.  Thanks mom.

Friday, May 17, 2013

Couch to 5K - Day 2

Today's "run" report. I definitely ran more than last time, but I will be repeating week one again next week. You're supposed to run three days every other day and then take two days off. I only ran Wednesday and Friday, but I'm still taking my two days off. Runner's prerogative.

Today, I saw a lot more squirrels. They must have heard about the nut running in their 'hood. I was also violently intimidated by two chihuahuas who eventually determined I wasn't a threat and briefly joined my jog. I was waved at by a young boy practicing soccer who was clearly impressed with my running. Clearly. A driver stopped for me to run across an intersection which was very cool.

For the most part, my music cooperated, but stopped after "American Idiot." Appropos, I suppose.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Couch to 5K - Day 1

Day 1 Couch to 5K: I only ran about half of what my zombie told me to run (of course, I picked the Zombie trainer), but I did run some, which is more than I've run in the last 20 years. 

My music got stuck in a Lady Gaga/Nirvana/Violent Femmes loop and I wanted to poke Lady Gaga in her Po-Po-Po-Poker Face, by the time I got home. Still fun though. I'm looking forward to Day 2 which will actually be two days from now.

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Rules of Me

Line Dancing
If I haven’t stood up to run to the dance floor with you when your favorite line dance starts playing, that means either (a) the song isn’t doing it for me or (b) the alcohol hasn’t kicked in.  Do not try to drag me to the dance floor with you.  That will only succeed in making me look like an asshole, which I mostly try to avoid.

Leader of the Band
Telling me to “STAND UP!!” … “CLAP YOUR HANDS!!” … “GET MOVING!!”… isn’t going to make me stand up, clap my hands or get moving.  Your constant instructions harsh my buzz and piss me off.  Leave me alone while I chillax and stop trying to be the boss of me.  Bossy performers give me flashbacks to the nuns in church:  stand up…sing…sit down…kneel.   Nuns are big buzz harshers.

Friday, February 15, 2013

Carnival Triumph...Martin Savidge...Rob Kenney

CNN reporter Martin Savidge is catching a lot of flack for mentioning Hurricane Katrina to passenger Rob Kenny as a comparison to their ordeal on the Carnival Triumph.  I agree that it was an unfortunate comparison, but I understand where Mr. Savidge was coming from.

We didn’t evacuate after Hurricane Ike and several times during the Carnival Triumph event, I thought their situation was comparable to our situation.  They had no power.  They had long lines for food, as we did for gas and water.  They were disconnected from the outside world. 

Although the cruise ship passengers didn’t lose their homes as some did in Katrina, when I compare their situation to the aftermath of other unfortunate events (snow storms, tornadoes, hurricanes), they also had the added elements of possibly dying at sea while surrounded by 4000 strangers and occasionally stepping into urine and poo.  Other than dog accidents, our hurricane event was mostly urine and poo free.  We were also in the relative comfort of our own homes rather than on the open sea sleeping in a hallway...with 4000 strangers.

Good for Rob Kenny keeping things in perspective, but Martin Savidge shouldn’t beat himself up too much.  The analogy was apt.  He just chose the wrong natural disaster for his comparison.