Big Brother 15

Andy = Gollum

McCrae = Megamind

UPDATE - 7/8/2013 !!!

How quickly things change.

At this point, I like Judd, Helen and Howard.

McCrae is okay, but the Amanda connection is annoying.

I like Andy, but he's beginning to be too hyper all over the place.   He needs to scam some of Aaryn's Adderall.

Elissa is a hot mess and I would really like to meet her and Rachel's parents.  I have questions.

Spence is, in Big Brother House terms, a shady fuck.

There is nothing I can say about Jeremy and Aaryn that has not already been said.  Evil incarnate.

Kaitlin is less evil, but still incarnate by association.

Gena Marie is a tad schizo, but she is who she is and I can appreciate that.

Nick could go all the way, but it's way too early in the season for all the shenanigans happening in this house to be able to pick a winner.

I don't like Candice and Jessie just on the basis of general unlikeableness.


******

Original Post - 6/27/2013

I didn't like the Jersey/New York blonde chick (GinaMarie) until I watched some BB After Dark.  Seemed like a normal person.

The Beaumont girl (Jessie) who was so annoying on the show, hardly said anything “after dark,” so I don’t know what to think about her.  Did not like her at all on the show.

“After Dark” on TVGN censors the cursing which is very distracting, so I don’t think I’ll be watching it much.

The girl who was the most annoying on the “After Dark” portion was the real estate agent chick (Amanda).  Would not shut up.  

Everyone else was really normal and likable, which surprised me.  At this early stage, I'm usually ready to evict half the cast immediately.

LOVE Rachel’s sister (Elissa)!

http://www.cbs.com/shows/big_brother/cast/

Roy and Dale Doing it Gangsta

I was flipping channels and saw "The Roy Rogers Show" playing on the RFD channel. I put it on for a few minutes and there were Roy and Dale walking around their house cooking and, generally, doing normal household stuff with six-shooters on their hips. So gangster.

"Anger Management"

I quit DVRing "Two and a Half Men" about halfway through the season without Charlie Sheen. On the other hand, I never miss Charlie Sheen's new show. Didn't see that coming.

In Defense of Christina Aguilara

Three things I have to say in defense of Christina Aguilera’s bad behavior on The Voice last night:

       1.  Because she thinks everything is about her, Tony Lucca’s performance of a song which included the edited out word “bitch” offended her personally.  She no doubt felt it was directed at her, because everything is about her, and proceeded to prove her point by acting like a bitch the rest of the night.  Texting/tweeting during the judge’s comment portion after one of Tony’s performances?  Classy.

       2.  Sneaking through the audience before the show paying those people to shout “I love you, Christina” must be exhausting.

3.  Her stylist hates her.

MTV is 30 years old? When did that happen?

While conversing with friends on Facebook, it came to my attention that MTV is 30 years old this year.  I remember hearing about that, but I don't remember freaking out about it like I am right now.

It occurs to me that teenagers today might be thinking the music of 1981 is as ancient as we thought the music of 1941 was when we were teenagers.

Are they looking at Rod Stewart, Bananarama and Pat Benatar the same way we looked at Bing Crosby, The Andrews Sisters and Judy Garland?

NPR isn't usually so weird

Today on NPR's website, there were stories about birds falling from the sky, fish dying by the thousands, a respected scientist presenting the hypothesis that there are actual wrinkles in time and a photo taken of a gunman right before the gunman shot the photographer to death.

If that's what's on NPR, I don't even want to know what's on the Sci Fi Channel.

This and That

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I just saw the worst network television transition in the history of awkward network television transitions on CBS.  Right after Marshall found out his dad had a heart attack and he and Lily were crying outside the bar on "How I Met Your Mother," the two new CBS morning "reporters" came on during the commercial break to talk us through our evening of Monday night hilarity and cheerfully said, "I know you're having fun now, but...yada, yada, yada."  Bad. Very bad.

***

When you walk into a co-worker's office and they don't hear you and they don't turn around from their computer, what do you do?  Do you walk away?  Do you say something and possibly scare them?  How long do you stand there before you take a few steps backward, make an "ahem" noise, and pretend you just walked in?

***

I was listening to the news and the announcer said, "Now, we'll hear from General Mills."  There's a real General Mills. I'm not sure why that pleases me.

***

I got unreasonably excited when I saw Derek on Grey's Anatomy shut off his clock radio and it was the same as mine. Awesome.

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I saw a gecko on the wall in my living room, couldn't catch it, then went out of town for four days. The whole time I was out of town, I just kept thinking about how fat that gecko looked and wondered if it was pregnant and if I'd come back to a townhouse full of geckos. So far, no gecko takeover.

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It's, Oh, So Quiet Official Video with Lyrics on Screen

Have you been wondering who is singing that song on the HBO promos with the girl screaming? It's Bjork singing "It's Oh So Quiet."

My Superficial Review of the New Television Season

As you will see below, I'm not impressed.  I haven't watched all of the new shows, but half of them I started to watch all began with some sort of dead body, so I changed the channel.  I'm not even kidding about that.  I wish I was.

Blue Bloods -
Yes.  Anything with Donnie Wahlberg gets a shot with me and ten points extra credit.

The Defenders -
Yes.  Las Vegas, Jim Belushi and Jerry O'Connell?  What's not to like?  Lots.  I like it anyway.

Hawaii Five-O -
No.  Too much testosterone.  Not that it's not quite nice testesterone.  I just prefer my testosterone to be mixed with a huge infusion of intelligence.  If a chase scene lasts more than ten seconds, I lose interest.  Too many chase scenes.  Too many explosions.

Mike and Molly -
No.  I like Mike and his partner and I like Molly.  Swoosie Kurtz and Molly's sister are annoying.

Sh*t My Dad Says -
No.  The book is hilarious and you should buy it immediately.  This show is more mean spirited than clever.  My family is full of dads like the one in the book and there are ways to be crass and always say almost the right thing that always comes out wrong without also appearing to be a jerk.  Maybe the mistake was casting William Shatner (who I love) as the dad.  Someone equally cranky, yet softer than Shatner (Bob Newhart-ish?) would have been a better choice.

Raising Hope -
No.  I couldn't watch ten minutes of this one.  (Sorry, Kara...Kara is my cousin and loves this one.)  It bugged the crap out of me.

Oursourced -
No.  I have no idea how this premise made it past the first network executive, let alone into primetime. 

I highly recommend...

Windshield Wonder (click here)

Community - Thursday @ 7:00 p.m. on NBC (click here)

Dad Update and The Countdown Begins

Dad Update
Nothing new to report on dad. They see the radiologists who originally inserted the stent tomorrow. Send prayers, happy thoughts and brain power toward Houston.

The Countdown Begins...

The Most Awesome Early Show Segment Ever

(Note: Curse words edited to get this blog past dirty word filters at your office, not because I'm a nice person.)

Kathy Bates

Sheila Blair

Maggie Rodriguez

This morning on The Early Show on CBS, Harry Smith was interviewing Sheila Blair, chairman of the FDIC. Sheila looks a lot like Kathy Bates. She and Harry were doing their damnedest to assure all of us that money in federally insured banks is safe (up to $250,000, that is) and that we shouldn’t worry our pretty little heads about it because the money is “…backed by the full faith and credit of the United States government. So, the money will always be there. We can't run out of money.” I’m not sure what that means exactly, but if Kathy Bates believes it, it must be true.

When the interview was over, Harry did his wrap-up and Maggie Rodriguez who was sitting next to him suddenly decided to throw a turd in the punchbowl. She informed us that she spoke to “her banker” yesterday and he told her that federally insured money is indeed safe, but there is no law stating how quickly a person will have access to their money and that it could possibly take years for people to actually get their money. Harry went pale looked at Maggie with eyes that said, “WTF, Maggie? We were trying to make everybody feel better. STFU!”

So, the producers cut to Dave Price doing the weather and when they went back to Harry, he was split screen with Kathy Bates and Kathy was pissed. Kathy/Sheila told us that if the FDIC steps in to insure your money, the transition is seamless and people can still use their ATM cards and write checks and yada, yada, yada. Piece of cake.

Not to be outdone, Maggie the Turd Thrower pressed Kathy Bates to admit that there is no time limit provision in the law saying how quickly the money must be made available to bank customers. Sheila/Kathy said, “No b*tch. There is no provision in the law about time limits, but I’m the chairman and this is how it’s done and don’t make me go all Misery on your ass and bust your ankles and sh*t.” I’m paraphrasing.

Sheila went on to say, “There are disreputable people out there like your dumbass banker ‘friend’ who are telling people it could take years to have access to their money, because they’re trying to sell people high risk insurance policies and gold coins and c-r-a-p like that.” Once again, I paraphrase.

Maggie, who obviously took a toke off the old crack pipe right before air time couldn't let it go. “Well, I’m going to make a phone call to my banker at Chase, right f-u-c-k-i-n-g now.” (She didn’t say f-u-c-k.) So, Mags caused this whole uproar, made Harry Smith go off-script, disrupted the entire Early Show, pissed off the FDIC and then decided, as an encore, to throw Chase Bank under the bus.

At that point, I had to turn off the television and get ready for work, but I imagined this going on all morning. Did the president of Chase then come on after the next commercial break to give us his two cents? Did Maggie then admit that perhaps it wasn’t her banker “friend” who gave her the bad information and that maybe it was actually Tom on MySpace who said he’d be her friend if she bought a krugerrand? Then, Tom comes on and is all, “WTF, Maggie?” and she’s banned from MySpace forever?

Would serve her right.

Up in Smoke: Seth Myers and Saturday Night Live on Kelloggs and Michael Phelps

Bits and Pieces

One day last week, I kept passing by a co-worker's desk and seeing the above bubble wrap with a hammer on it. How bad has your day been when you have to take a hammer to the bubble wrap?
As I was preparing my healthy lunch of sausage biscuit, potato chips and Dr. Pepper, I noticed my supposedly unopened box of six sausage biscuits was two sausage biscuits short. What the hell? Jimmy Dean owes me some sausage. Upon further inspection, I found that some pot heads had opened the bottom of the box and snaked two sausage biscuits. A pot head owes me some sausage.


We have a new cable channel called "Chiller." At first, I was excited. After perusing the channel guide, however, I find the station carries a lot of slasher type stuff, which I'm not crazy about unless zombies are involved. On the other hand, there's going to be a Twin Peaks marathon all day Tuesday. I feel a sick day coming on.

My two newest television addictions...as though I need more

Cesar Millan - Dog Whisperer on National Geograhic Channel

(Click here for more information.)

Shatner's Raw Nerve on Biography Channel

(Click here for details and videos.)

As God is My Witness...

The absolutely, positively best sitcom Thanksgiving episode ever. HAPPY THANKSGIVING, everybody!!!

Watch the whole episode here. There's a six second ad at the beginning, so I'm pretty sure it's legal. You should all make watching this classic episode part of your Thanksgiving tradition. Enjoy!

Whatever, Martha

There's a television network called "Fine Living" which I rarely watch. However, while I was scrolling through the on-screen guide tonight, I noticed a show about hauntings was going to play later. So, I went ahead and switched over early and accidently found a great show.

These two women were sitting on couches and ragging on Martha Stewart. Eventually, I realized that one of the women (the blond in the video below) is Martha Stewart's real actual daughter. Perfect.

New Television Season

I like this show...



I like this show...



I freakin' LOVE this car (as seen on My Own Worst Enemy)...

John McCain dissed David Letterman...big mistake

Found this on Best Week Ever.tv...

What Would Hank Hill Listen To?

Sometimes when I'm feeling especially Texas-y, I listen to KSHN 99.9 out of Liberty County. Though you would expect country music on a rural Texas radio station, they play a wide variety of music including a lot of soft classic rock (Boston, Kansas, Steely Dan, etc.).

The part Hank Hill would like are the very local news reports (including local obituaries, farm equipment thievery, church news...), the fact that all of the announcers have a pleasant East Texas accent, extensive coverage of the local high school football games and the farm reports.

I think Hank and Peggy would love it.

(Right now, they constantly promote the Trinity Valley Exposition Fair. I'm pretty sure Hank and Peggy would be attending.)