Friday, February 24, 2012

The Perfect Storm

Last night, I was stopped at a stop sign and two cars were traveling toward each other on the cross street in front of me.  They caught my eye, because they were both really zooming.  As they got closer, I noticed that one of them was a Domino's delivery dude and the other was a Papa John's delivery dude.  As they got even closer, I realized they were both turning onto my street and they were both determined to get onto my street first.

Luckily, Papa John's dude made it to the corner a wee bit faster than Domino's dude and all ended well.  I'm not disappointed that I didn't end up sandwiched between two pizza dudes, but I think it would have made for a really interesting accident report.

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Happy Mardi Gras! Live cams!!

Live cameras from Bourbon Street and Jackson Square!

From the Cat's Meow, we have several views and you can zoom.  Check below the large image for additional views. (Formerly known as the Bourbocam.)

Click here.

From Jackson Square, watch the party from the comfort of your couch.

Click here.

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine's Day Quiz: What is neither a man nor a woman?

Our building laid out a lovely candy spread in the lobby this morning for Valentine's Day.  On the table, along with lots of candies of many sorts, was a pink paper with Valentine's Day "facts."  One of the facts was:

"73% of Valentine Day flowers are bought by men, whereas women buy only 23% of Valentine flowers."

Let's do the math

Lets assume for our calculations that the "flowers" are roses.  According to one website, 110 million roses will be bought for Valentine's Day.

73% + 23% = 96%

73% = men

23% = women

4% = ? (!)

4% of 110,000,000 roses = 440,000 roses

That gives us 36,666 dozen roses bought by people other than men and/or other than women.

Rounding up for flowers given on Valentine's Day which are not roses and rounding down for the showoffs who give more than one dozen roses to their amour, let's just say that 36,666 people who are neither men nor women are giving flowers to their significant other.

That seems like an awful lot of he/shes to me, even for The United States of America.  Does anyone have RuPaul's phone number, because I have some questions?

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Tommy Jordan Video Dad is an Ass

I'm glad this idiot and his daughter made up (according to this update). Almost all of my friends and family think this guy did the right thing. I think his daughter is the way she is, because he is the way he is.

Serve him coffee? Mess up the floor she just cleaned and not apologize or, god forbid, clean it up yourself? Why is she making the bed in the guest room? Who slept there that they can't make up their own damn bed? Ground her for THREE months? He's an ass.

Teach her a lesson about the value of things by destroying a computer?

Her mistake was putting in writing the things that teenagers have said to their friends throughout eternity. I'm sure she'll turn out just fine and she'll raise her kids in the same obnoxious, domineering way that this guy raised her.

Whatever works for them, I guess. It seems to have all worked out fine...until the next outburst...from both of them.

Sunday, February 05, 2012

Still Open for Business

In case anyone was wondering, this blog is still open for business.  It's just on hiatus for lack of dedication by its author.  Slacker.

Today's Ava-isms

In response to "how old are you?" to her Uncle Dan:  Wow!  That's a lot.

Telling a story about what we would do if she got hurt:  Y'all would be saying "Help me Jesus!  Help me Jesus" in her best Medea voice.

In response to meeting Nanny's friends:  Are they going to all get in my face?

At the fountain in Howell's:  "Wait.  What are you going to do?"

Driver's license:  Why do you have that mean look on your face.  Grandma has a funny looking picture in her wallet.  Show 'em grandma.