Friday, December 01, 2006

A Laurie Drinking Primer

When Laurie indulges in:

Smirnoff Ice – Makes me want to sit and talk.

Vodka – Makes me think people are being mean to me. In my brain, I’m constantly thinking “Fine!” like Cissy on Urban Cowboy. I almost got into my first bar fight while drinking vodka tonics.

Gin – Makes me giggly. One night Bonnie and I were both drinking gin and tonics and we laughed at everything and everybody. Bonnie and I have that affect on each other anyway. On gin, you can multiply that by a thousand.

Wine – Makes me feel silly and smart at the same time.

Tequila – Makes me a loud, happy, dancing machine.

Rum – Makes me mellow.

White Russians/Black Russians – For some reason, this is the only drink that makes me have holes in my memory. I remember about 80% of the night but there are big holes in the evening that are only verified photographically. Something about the vodka and Kahlua mixture I guess. (This is a Laurie/Melissa drinking together favorite.)

Jagermeister – Multiply the tequila affect by about twelve.

Whisky – Unless someone can remind me of a cocktail I’ve indulged in that contains any sort of whiskey, I have no idea on this one.

Beer - I've only had one full beer in my life and that was a few months ago. I'm guessing the affect would be a lot like my Smirnoff Ice buzz.

Mixing any of the above - The results are various and unpredictable. Add a headache to the hangover.


gnightgirl said...

Having stuck to beer or wine my entire life, I was suprised to learn recently that vodka drinks have the exact opposite effect on me than they do you. I love everyone. I lick my friends, and ask young men if I can kiss them to see if I can feel their lip rings or not. All in the name of science.

And...back to lite beer for me.

La Sirena said...

Hmmm...the chemistry of alcohol is such an intersting science -- rarely uniform.

Tequila turns me into either a nymphomaniac or a boxer -- depending on my pre-drinking mood. Wine gets me stupid drunk. Very much a head buzz. I agree -- gin is giddy hilarity. Vodka is insidious...I am quite convinced that I am absolutely sober until falling on my ass on the way to the ladies room.

It's best if I stick to beer and the odd whiskey.

Jen T. (that's me) said...

I am usually a beer girl, but recently ran across one I didn't like. Abita Purple Haze. I had four of them in fairly quick succession, and didn't even catch a buzz! I got ripped off.

Grimm said...

Amaretto Sours - The liquid eqivalent to Juicy Fruit.

Southern Comfort - Only have had one, but surprisingly smooth.

Jolly Rancher - No idea what was in it and really don't remember much afterward either.

Amarettos are my favorite as I am not a drinker. Although that may change if my wife is allowed to drink again (breastfeeding).

TexasGal said...

In my vast experience of drinking I have one learned rule that I stick to: Don't mix! I start the night on something and that's what I finish with. If not, the results are not pretty.

pokerboss said...

So what are you planning to drink before the Foreigner concert? If we're gonna be hanging out together on Crockett Street, I want to know what to expect. We'll be at Rio Rita's, so maybe tequila is called for; but since Bonnie will be there, I vote for gin. On another subject, I wish I was one of gnightgirl's friends.

Peter said...

WOW, you really are the professional drinker that you claimed to be Laurie.

Laurie said...

Gnight Girl - "In the name of science"...I haven't tried that one, yet. Thanks for the tip.

La Sirena - I should definitely drink more gin.

Jen - Bastards!

Grimm - Amaretto sours are delicious! I haven't had enough to tell you how they make me feel though. That sounds like a quest to me.

Texas Gal - Good advice!

Poker Boss - I can't go to Rio Rita's without having a Grande Suprema margarita. We'll have to plan a gin night for another time.

Peter - Are you saying you doubted me?! Blasphemer! :)

Astrid said...

I'll go for the vodka-cranberry, please! Haha ... usually it only makes me even more talkative! It is a good thing I always have so many stories to tell then, huh?

Sophmom said...

I stick to beer (administered regularly) and champagne (rare occasions), and wine when it's offered to me by a host. Liquor makes me stupid drunk. I love Jack Daniels and Irish Whiskey though. Good Cognac is a nice treat too and provides a unique, sometimes scary, buzz. Yummmm.

Donna said...


Drinking any of that stuff just makes me *drunk*.

Laurie said...

Astrid - Try orange flavored vodka with the cranberry sometime. It's very good.

Sophmom - I've heard the same thing about cognac. I'll have to try that.

Donna - Oh, yeah. That happens, too.

NOMAD said...

how about cognac ?

too bad I can't drink anymore (my stomach doesn't support it)

except wine, but what I prefer the most is bubbles wine

Laurie said...

Nomad - I forgot about Champagne. I'm going to catch flack for this but I don't like Champagne.

Jack said...

Sake The happiest of all drinks. Not the best tasting--by a longshot--but the happiest drunk I know.

Laurie said...

Jack - I thought I was the happiest drunk you know.