Thursday, December 28, 2006

The Facts of Life...and Death

Christmas Eve night, as usually happens, my parents and aunts and uncles migrated to my mom's living room, the rest of the men and teenagers gravitated to the game room and the rest of us found ourselves in the den sort of watching A Christmas Story but mostly just bullshitting about this and that.

For reasons I can't remember, we started talking about the unpredictability of life, or more precisely, the unpredictability of death. It was just your normal Ransonette/Courville festive holiday conversation.

We talked about how people shouldn't be afraid to live their lives the way they want and that people shouldn't be hesitant to take great leaps of faith when the moment strikes them because a person could...

"...walk out the door and get hit by a bus!"

"...drop dead while they're sleeping!"

"...fall into a hole!"

Then, I said, "Or, I could walk over to the fireplace right now and pick up that fireplace poker right there and smack Cindy across the back of her head."

At first, there was silence.

Then, people got into the spirit of the conversation.

"That's true!"

"Yeah, just like that, Cindy would be deader than a post. Dead"

"Just like that. BAM!"

"When the cops get here, because the parents would no doubt call the police," I said, "You guys would just say, 'Oh, she's dead alright, but, it's okay ossifer, Laurie was just trying to make a point about the unpredictability of life, or more precisely, the unpredictability of death.'"

I really shouldn't drink vodka.


Comfort Addict said...


As always, you are funny.I do agree that we should live life without fear. However, there is a line between acting without fear and acting recklessly. One of the advantages of age is knowing where the line is. That said, we should go for it.

By the way, if you're into pokers, and philosophy, check out a book called Wittgenstein's Poker. It shows that even the greats will occasionally pick up large, sharp objects to make their points.

Serena Joy said...

Poor Cindy. Maybe you should drink MORE vodka, Laurie. LOL.

Seriously, though, I'm the polar opposite of my mother. She won't take a step without worrying about the possible consequences, while I'll do pretty much anything and dare anything bad to happen. She swears I'm not adopted.:)

cindybindy said...

Cindy should have been paying better attention to her surroundings. Trust me, if someone with a fireplace poker comes close to this Cindy, I'm running. Probably run out in the street in front of a car, but running. I guess that would prove your point, death is unpredictable, but who really wants to know when it's there turn to bite the big one? Hope you had a great Christmas. :)

Grimm said...

I was thinking it was Lennie's way of saying Merry Christmas!

Is Cindy commonly the object of your brutality?

Laurie said...

Comfort Addict - I'm going to buy that!

Serena Joy - I am far too cautious. I overthink everything...unless there's vodka...or tequila...or...

Cindy - We had a great Christmas! Hope you did, too.

Grimm - Ah, Lennie. You might have a point there. As for Cindy, she's just easy to scare. :)

Zina said...

I am just glad for once that I am way up here in Dallas for the holidays and not home with my "loving" "normal" cousins!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Kwanza and Happy New Year....

Peter said...

More importantly Laurie, Cindy shouldn't drink Vodka (or anything else) while you are in the proximity of that fireplace.

Laurie said...

Zina - We'll see you at Easter right, My Pretty? Bwahahahaha!

Peter - That's good advice for anyone.

pokerboss said...

It's true, Laurie shouldn't drink vodka. LuLu, however should be encouraged to chug Grey Goose dirty martinis.

Laurie said...

Pokerboss - I know a few others who would agree with you on that one.

Sophmom said...

O-M-G!! I literally have tears running down my face. Of course, the others want to know what's so funny so I've read it out loud (harder than you think). Hilarious.

Laurie said...

Sophmom - Oh, you made my day!