Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Fig This

I’ve been listening to the five XM Radio Christmas stations (contemporary, traditional, country, classical and crazy) for a couple of weeks now and I’ve come to the conclusion that there are five or six actual Christmas songs and those five or six songs are repeatedly performed by approximately 3,623 different artists. I’ll let you do the math.

I’m not yet tired of all of this jolliness but I can sense a change in my tolerance level approaching. Every time I hear, “Oh bring us a figgy pudding…we won’t go until we get some…so bring some out here…” I get a little tense. If a bunch of people were standing on my porch screaming, “HEY, BRING ME SOME GOT DAMN FIGGY PUDDING RIGHT NOW AND WE AIN’T LEAVING UNTIL YOU DO,” they’d get some extra special figgy pudding along with a bright red Santa boot shoved up their collective asses.

Now, get off damn my porch, you bunch of fig heads.

10 comments:

Serena Joy said...

I'm not that great at math, but that Figgy song is the one Christmas song I just can't stand, the one guaranteed to make me want to be unseasonable to the first person I see. It's so IRRITATING!

Sophmom said...

My blog friend, Zen Wizard (beware of craziness) had a pic of actual "figgy pudding" on his blog recently and it had a very high "EWWWW" factor, although reading the recipe sounded pretty yummy, since I actually like figs. But the stuff looked nasty.

Grimm said...

Good grief, I miss a few days and miss all the good stuff!

I shall go back and take all the quizzes and all of the wonderful goodiness you have to offer!

Also, if you wish, I have tagged you for a meme. Please do not hate me. I do not have many friends.

Best version of that of that song is by the Muppets with Animal in the background yelling "Won't go! won't go! won't go!" during that portion.

Laurie said...

Serena Joy - I totally agree.

Sophmom - I like figs, too. It's the pudding part I'm not so sure about.

Grimm - Oh, I LOVE them Muppets, especially Animal.

Roxan said...

I hate that song. Speaking of figgy pudding I don't know much about it, but someone once told me a certain amount to bugs are allowed in fig newtons to which I replied, "That must be those little crunchy things in it." LOL

Laurie said...

Roxan - I might have eaten my last fig newton. Nah, probably not.

Roxan said...

Good gravy I just looked at what I wrote. "amount to bugs"
You will find I never spell anything wrong-I just use the wrong word. LOL

Laurie said...

Roxan - You're going to fit right in here, then.

Anonymous said...

How embarrassing. I thought it was PIGGY pudding. Like that makes since.
Baby sis

Laurie said...

Baby Sis - HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!