Wednesday, December 20, 2006

In Laurie's Brain - Rhonda the Redneck Nail Tech

This is for Jen's comment on my previous post. I wrote her a little ditty I like to call...

Rhonda the Redneck Nail Tech


You know Shelli and Sheila

and Cindy and Ellen

Linda and Lisa

and Mitzi and Helen.

But do you recall

The most famous nail tech of all?


Rhonda the redneck nail tech

Had a nasty Texas drawl.

And if you ever heard it

It would make your skin just crawl.


All of the other nail techs

Used to sneer and mock her voice.

They only let poor Rhonda

Do the nails of ugly boys.


Then the richest man in town

Said to her one day,

"Rhonda with your shirt so tight

Won't you do my nails tonight?"


Then all the nail techs loved her.

But she told them "Kiss mah ass."

Rhonda the redneck nail tech

Married into oil and gas.


By Laurie Anderson

19 comments:

Serena Joy said...

LMAO! It rocks, it's got rhythm, and you can by God dance to it.:)

Laurie said...

Serena Joy - Hahahaha! Thanks!

gawilli said...

This kind of reminds me of a Paul Thorn song..."Joanie, the Jehovah's Witness Stripper". Very funny!

Peter said...

Love it Laurie, it's got a spot in my "Bloggers Poetry files"

Jen T. (that's me) said...

Aw, thanks! It's made my morning! :)

Rev. Qelqoth said...

And of course, they lived happily ever after in a special truck, eating roadkill for their Sunday lunch. :D

Grimm said...

I bow down to your supreme songwriting abilities!

That little ditty makes my attempt this Friday seem pretty feeble.

Really hilarious work.

Laurie said...

Gawilli - Oh, I have to look up that Jehovah Witness thing.

Peter - Cool!

Jen - You give me the best ideas.

Rev - But, of course!

Grimm - No! I can't wait to read your winner!

gnightgirl said...

You are a creative genius, and she be paid millions! I love it!

Popeye said...

You can actully sing this to the tune of Gilligan's Island!

Leslie said...

I think you've found your calling. This was awesome.

Laurie said...

GnightGirl - From your mouth to God's ears.

Popeye - I'm trying but I can't get the stupid Rudolph tune out of my head. I'll try again in February.

Leslie - I like the sound of this being my calling. So much more fun than what I'm calling my calling right now.

cindybindy said...

I am laughing my little red neck ass off :) This is too cute. You are so gifted :)

Queen of the Universe said...

That was incredible, I can almost hear it playing on the radio. AM of course :)

Laurie said...

Cindy - :)

Queen of the Universe - Of course!

Rev. Qelqoth said...

This was too cool!

Laurie said...

Rev - :)

Lorna said...

I, for one, am shocked!

Laurie said...

Lorna - I thought you were shock proof!