Thursday, October 26, 2006

That's Obscene!

Did you know that it’s illegal to possess, promote, or sell obscene material in the State of Texas? Did you also know that, in Texas, obscene material includes all that stuff you can buy at “fun parties?” I’ve been to a couple of those “fun parties.” I used to pretend I was enjoying myself but not anymore. There are some things I just don’t want to know about the sex lives of my family and friends. When I do go to one of those parties, I cower in the corner and pray nobody notices me as they discuss the quality and quantity of their orgasms and pass around devices and creams and some items that look just plain dangerous.

Back to the topic of the Texas definition of obscenity, what a person uses when she is in a self-satisfying sexual state of mind should be between her and Johnny Depp or , if she's in a particularly scary self-satisfying sexual state of mind, between her and Keith Richards. Certainly any accoutrement used between couples of any sexual orientation shouldn’t be under a Texas judge’s jurisdiction unless the judge happens to be part of the proceedings, so to speak

According to a news story yesterday, undercover Beaumont Narcotics and Vice officers went into three local businesses and purchased allegedly obscene items and then presented them to a judge who ruled that they were obscene. I would have liked to have heard the clerk’s conversations when the undercover persons left their shops, “Did you see what that dude bought? He didn’t even look like a freak. He looked like a cop or something.” Or, “Oh, my God! That woman just bought enough dildos to vibrate a small country.”

Sure, I heard that the shops that were raided sell butt plugs and other similarly exotic accessories but, if those items aren’t used at the corner of Dowlen and Phelan or under the clock at Parkdale Mall I don’t see where it’s the business of society at large.

The scariest part to me is, according to Lt. James Clay, Beaumont Police, "Everyone that works there can be charged. The owners can be charged because it's based on possession, promotion and sale. The clerk is responsible for the sale and the owner is responsible for purchasing the items and putting them in the store."

That means all of those arrested, including sales clerks, could be found guilty of violating obscenity laws and could face up to one year in jail and a $4,000 fine. Now, that's obscene.

16 comments:

Jack said...

Silly as the law may be, surely you can appreciate the humor in charging a dildo distributor with a violation of sec. 43.23 of the PENAL Code.

Laurie said...

Huh, huh..huh, huh...you said penal.

Nomad said...

then all europeans should be under pursuit :lol:

Laurie said...

Nomad - Amsterdam has all the right ideas.

Peter said...

I'm with you in that corner Laurie, (no I'm not really, we aren't there in the first place) but as far as being illegal.... just who wrote the laws in Texas????

gawilli said...

Obscene is in the eye of the beholder. I don't care much for the parties either - but that's ok, some do. I really resent someone telling me what I can or can't do or buy, even if I don't want it!

Laurie said...

Peter - I don't know. I'm going to check into that though.

Gawilli - Amen to that!

Jack said...

Peter- Those laws date back to a time when Democrats held every major office in Texas.

Jen T. (that's me) said...

Of course it's nobody's business as long as the promoters/purchasers of said items are not using them on the street corner or at the school bus stop. But then again, habeas corpus (sp?) did just get killed... it's only a matter of time before they're [the government] in our bedrooms too.

Laurie, you don't think they can track from store records and register receipts *who* bought things there, do you? Someone who might have used a credit or debit card perhaps? I have this friend, you see... They couldn't extradite this person if they had moved to another state...say, Louisiana???

Laurie said...

Jack - Democrats?! It sounds like such a conservatively Republican thing to do.

Jen - I still can't believe I missed that little field trip. I'm sure the authorities are reviewing the store video security tapes as we speak.

Jack said...

Laurie-- YOu gotta remember, these are Texas Democrtats we're talking about. They're also the ones who gave us section 21.06 of the Penal Code: "A person commits an offense if he engages in deviate sexual intercourse with another individual of the same sex." It may be unconstitutional (if you believe the Supreme Court)but it was enacted by the Democrats and it's still on the books.

Jen-- As long as you didn't buy at least six "obscene devices" at one time, they'll presume you're just a small-time user and leave you alone. It's the pushers they're after. (The law doesn't prohibit simple possession of "obscene devices," it's possession with the intent to distribute, and they don't presume an that intent unless you have at least six.)

Laurie said...

Jack - I know some allegedly small-time users who would definitely violate the six devices rule. Throw away those receipts ladies!

Big Brother said...

You can read the law by clicking on my name. Start at § 43.21 for the definitions, then scroll down to § 43.23 to see what's not allowed.

Note that the definition of "obsecene device" is limited to products "designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs." Apparantly when the legislature was writing this law, they saw nothing wrong with objects designed and marketed to be inserted elsewhere. Which I guess makes sense when you think about it.

Laurie said...

Big Brother - Now, that's some interesting stuff right there.

DB Cooper said...

AMEN TO THAT! That IS obscene! Don't ya just love legislated morality?

Laurie said...

D.B. - It sure seems like they would all have better things to do.