Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Now What's He Doing?

Sometimes life gives us a second chance. In September of this year, before I had a blog, I saw something ridiculous and had nowhere to express my amazement. Now, four months later, I have been given the unique opportunity to address the same absurd spectacle.

In September, during the landfall of Hurricane Frances, I asked my friends and family, "What the hell is Dan Rather doing in Florida? The man is 73 years old. Give it a rest already."

Tonight I ask a similar question. "What the hell is Dan Rather doing in Indonesia? The man is 73 years old. This can't be a good idea."

My dad is almost 73 and he's freaking out because he hasn't gotten his flu shot. Meanwhile, old Dan is over in malaria and typhoid country still looking for the big story. Granted, we have a hard time keeping dad off the roof when it's time to put up the Christmas decorations, but that's about the limit of his daredevil activities these days.

Sure, when one of dad's more prominently visible teeth broke recently and he couldn't get to a dentist right away, he reattached the broken portion with Super Glue, but you don't see him running around in hurricane force winds at this age.

Yeah, dad drove to the dumpster a few blocks away at 1:00 a.m. New Years Eve night, right when all the drunks are out, in a truck with a standard transmission and his right leg in a huge leg brace (don't ask) just to dump out the leftover gumbo.

Forget it. Men are crazy. Period. End of story.


Zina said...

Men are even dumber in pairs! One night my brother came home drunk. For some odd reason it was really late and Dad & I were still up watching TV. Well, Chris came in and did the whole "I'm not drunk act!" I wasn't paying attention to the two of them...but a few minutes later my brother got up to make a run for the bathroom--my dad was coming from the bathroom...he intercepted my brother, opened the front door and Chris ran across the street to throw up. I asked Dad where is he going and he mumbled something about he went to throw up. I looked at him and looked out the door and there was Chris ACROSS THE STREET hurling in our neighbors yard. I didn't ask why or even say DUH. I just went to bed....can you imagine what the neighbors thought when they found all that vomit in their yard.
What do you expect from two generations of men that at the same age in life both got arrested for public intoxication for just walking down the street.

Laurie said...

Hey! WE lived "across the street"! Yuck!

hatteraspainter said...

Hi Laurie;
As far as Mr. Dan Rather is concerened there isn't any chance he'll get hurt, sick, or even become slightly ill. The old adage is "only the good die young" hence he'll live forever. In fact I think, there is more of a chance he'll cause a disease than contract one.

I hate to admitt it but you're right about us guys doing things we shouldn't, either because of age, health or know how. For instance your dad up on the roof installing Christmas decorations. That isn't a job for your dad, that's a job for a woman. Everyone knows women are better decorators than men and if some woman wanted to do it, I'll bet he'd even be willing to hold the ladder for you, umm, I mean her. Hee hee hee...

Last I just want you to know there is hope for your dad, my dad quit climbing onto the roof 2 years ago. Much to my protests (as he calls me to do it now) besides the good DIE YOUNG. He's 92 so he's got a lot of time left before they'll take him. LOL On the plus side, I know there is a place in heaven for him, more than I'd say for a lier like Dan Rather.

Marty Morrow said...

somewhere along the way, Dan Rather decided that he wasn't just delivering the news, it was news because HE was delivering it. An ego like that can't imagine not being the one in the camera.

Lorna said...

I think the more comprehensive question is "What are you doing watching Dan Rather?" You could be watching "The Surreal Life" or "Celebrity Fitness", or you could be watching the Canadians WINNING at World Hockey in a sports bar.