Thursday, July 20, 2006

Driving Tip #562


If you’re driving along and notice you’ve missed your exit, drive to the next exit and backtrack. Really, there is actually another exit ahead. I swear, I’m not making that up. Basically, what I’m saying to you is this. Instead of cutting across three lanes of traffic going 75 miles per hour, just keep going and turn around instead of driving like an empty headed, brainless, dickless, asswipe.

By the way, I wrote down your license plate number and, as soon as the technology is available, I look forward to tracking you down like the dog you are and gleefully zapping you into oblivion with my Anti-Matter Turbo 4000 (patent pending).

9 comments:

Mommy said...

Bahaha!

Laurie said...

Jen - Asswipe. (Him, not you.) :)

Peter said...

It's just not your week Laurie, is it?

Renee said...

I hate when people pull that shit! That's a good way to scare the crap out of someone!!!

Laurie said...

Peter - Now that you mention it...

Renee - My heart did skip a beat.

Anonymous said...

When you get yours, let me know. I want one of those Anti-Matter Turbo 4000s for the Atlanta traffic idiots....

Laurie said...

I'll have you put on the mailing list.

nothing_but_coke said...

AMEN!!! That happens way too frequently here in Houston. I wish I had something to zap them with at that very instance!!

Laurie said...

Shelli - I need to patent something.