Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Aieeeeeeeeee!!!

Several days ago I did a post with a poll question asking people how they say the word mayonnaise. Last night, as I was unloading groceries, a bottle of mi-nez (that's mayo to 23% of you) fell off the top rack of my refrigerator door and landed smack dab onto the tips of two of the toes on my left foot.

Luckily, it wasn't the glass jar of apple butter.

Unluckily, even though it was one of those new fangled plastic containers, it was full and hit those two toes at some kind of an angle that sent me into a cussing fit that would have embarrassed Andrew Dice Clay. I haven't cussed like that since Constantine got kicked off of American Idol last year.

First, I do a post about mayonnaise, then a container of mayonnaise jumps off the refrigerator door and smacks me on my toes. My life is just one big weird-ass, cosmic coincidence.

11 comments:

Peter said...

G'day Laurie, (it's Australia Day) I can feel the pain of that all the way "down under" I'm not familiar with Andrew Dice Clay, sounds impressive though.
Here we "swear like a bullocky" these were the teamsters for the teams of up to 20 bullocks used to haul really heavy logs out to sawmills, evidently the only language they understood was profanity.

Tim said...

The power of your blog must be used for good, and good only! You must blog about winning the lottery, or about sudden peace in the middle east!

Bruce -- Harper Blue said...

Remember the refrigerator commercial some 5 or 10 years ago, where the woman talks about the space in the freezer? She says something like, "It's enough to keep that 16-pound turkey from dropping on your foot. Try explaining that to your HMO!" I've always loved that one!

For me, it's usually been kicking things. I think my small toes are malformed because, at least once a year while I was growing up, I'd swing my foot the wrong way walking into a room and kick a dresser or a chair leg or some silly thing. I wouldn't be surprised if I actually broke them a few times and never knew it.

Ed Abbey said...

You must be a politician since you can turn the 5% actual statistic into the 23% that was the result for Mayo. For a second there, I couldn't believe that 23% of you $%&* #^%$! readers of this blog actually thought of it as mi-nez!

Renee said...

The mi-nez gods are not smiling down on you, Laurie.
Sorry about that. I hate things falling on my toes.

Jack said...

Better watch what you drink this weekend. It looks like you're about due for a tatoo.

Laurie said...

Peter - Happy Australia Day!

Tim - *thinking happy thoughts* *thinking happy thoughts* *thinking happy thoughts*

Bruce - I'm a big toe stubber myself. I'm pretty accident prone all the way around actually.

Ed - I actually really really call it mi-nez. :) Really!!

Renee - It hurt like a bitch and the toes are now a lovely shade of purple. It doesn't hurt anymore though.

Jack - I'm far too ticklish for a tattoo. Can you imagine getting that alligator thing in the armpit area? I wouldn't know whether to laugh or cry. I'd probably do both.

Perhaps a fake one though...

Hmmmmmmm..........

Sophmom said...

Maybe now, Constantine will fall on you! :D

Laurie said...

Sophmom - Now, that's what I call good karma.

Stephen said...

I'm back...finally!!

Funny thing, my mom was from New Orleans and I grew up hearing mi-nez all the time.

Laurie said...

Stephen - Welcome back. I still say mi-nez to the horror of some of my readers.