- Gyms (and the people in them) stink.
- I don't like waiting for Ms. Butt-Like-A-Rock to do 300 leg presses on the one leg press machine.
- I don't care how thoroughly people wipe down a machine, it doesn't erase the fact that someone's disgusting body fluids were just all over it.
- I don't like the stink-eye I get when I accidentally take someone's favorite mat or special spot in the aerobics class.
- Putting mirrors in the aerobics class is just mean.
- Step class was specifically designed to humiliate and embarrass me.
If someone would create a gym that was designed like a huge playground, I would join. All of the equipment (swings, merry-go-rounds, slides, monkey bars, see-saws) would be at least 50 yards from each other and you would have to run to each one (holding hands with your best friend if you like) hollering, "Hey, guys! Wait up!". The boys would chase the girls and there would be tether ball and kickball and dodge ball. Maybe, sometimes someone would bring a baton and teach us all how to twirl.
Please tell me someone has already thought of this and tell me where I can sign up.