Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Old Horsetail Snake

This is one of my favorite blogging friends. He is better known as Old Horsetail Snake. Hoss lives in an Old and Wrinkly Folks' Home (that's one of his many names for the place where he lives) in Oregon.

This link explains why he is staying in the Old Farts Home (another of his names for it).

This link is a memorial to his wife who passed away a few weeks ago.

I introduce you to him because, if you aren't reading him, you should start today. These are a couple of snippets from his post today. I thought they were hilarious.

While cleaning out his room to move to a smaller apartment in the Old Farts Home, he found an old business card he had created for himself:

Treasure Maps - Fine Wines - White Women - Guns and Butter - Fertilizers and Contraceptives - Stag Parties and Box Socials


Free-Booter - Raconteur - Bon Vivant - Gourmand - Connoisseur - Hedonist - Privateer Savant - Iconoclast - Swashes Buckled - Wars Fought - Masses Inflamed - Kings Dethroned - Shipping Disrupted - Devils Advocated - Camps Raided

He also found a card that put him "...in good standing as a member of the 'International Society of Imbibing Physiognomists**', which qualified me to use the title of "Indoor Bird Watcher."

Membership was granted to those who identified the following birds through the bottom of a martini glass while seated:
  • Emerald-Throated Dowager
  • Extra Marital Lark
  • Whiteheaded Crotchgobbler
  • Great American Regret
  • Red-Eyed Vertigo
  • Morning Grouse
  • Gimlet-Eyed Bushtit
  • Rosy-Breasted Pushover
  • Midnight Bed Thrasher
  • Swift Running Peewee
  • Ruffled Spouse
  • Hairychested Nut Scratcher
  • Red-Peckered Woodhead

**A stupe who studies the outer appearance of a person - primarily the face - to gain knowledge of the inner personality.

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