Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Told You So

When you live in an apartment complex, you get used to hearing and witnessing domestic disputes and various and sundry interpersonal conflicts up close and personal. Sometimes they come from the apartment above you and sometimes they come from the apartments on either side of you. They almost always come between 2:00 and 6:00 a.m.

Sometimes, if it's in an apartment several units down, you don't hear the actual screaming and yelling and bouncing against the walls, but you see the unmistakable glow of emergency vehicle lights reflected on the walls of your bedroom as they roll by on their way to the scene of the latest drama.

Many years ago, when I lived in an apartment, I was awakened (at around 2:00 a.m., of course) by the sound of a man screaming, "You SHOT me! You SHOT me! I can't believe you shot me."

Idiot that I am, I didn't hit the floor like I should have. Instead, I kneeled down on my pillow, peered through my mini-blinds and looked out the window behind my headboard. On the lawn in front of one of the apartment units across the street from me was a guy lying on the ground writhing in pain and holding his foot. At the top of the stairs leading up to one of the second floor units stood a man with a gun. In the doorway of the apartment stood a woman with a phone to her ear who I assumed was calling the police. Although I was all the way across the street, I could tell that she didn't seem very upset.

When the man on the ground took a break from expressing his disbelief at being shot, the man at the top of the stairs calmly yelled down to him in the most matter of fact way, "I told you, if you came over here, I was going to shoot you."

I never found out the details of what lead up to the shooting nor did I ever hear whatever became of the shootee who I'm assuming was your run of the mill drunken ex-husband or ex-boyfriend asshole type. But whenever I think about that simple line, calmly stated, with the gun still in his hand, for some reason it makes me smile: "I told you, if you came over here, I was going to shoot you." So very John Wayne. So very Texas.


Deek Deekster said...

i've never shot anyone, but i do have problems sleeping sometimes, and being kept awake by night noise can get me to the point where if i had a gun, i would definitely take aim. i sometimes fantasise about having a high-powered rifle with telescopic sights and an invisible suit. but that's normal, isn't it? why are you backing away? no, i'm safe, really...

Vettacini Sheppard said...

"I once shot a man just to watch him die."

No, I didn't but that is a great line in a movie.

"I'm your huckleberry." "I have not yet begun to defile myself..."

If I would've lived back in the days of Doc Holiday, I would've married him.

Anonymous said...

So very John Wayne. So very Texas ... so very CRAZY!
~ Andrew

Lorna said...

Once when I was young and foolish, I lived in an apartment complex that I hadn't realized when I chose it, was a very hot drug pick-up spot. There were always people yelling and threatening and jumping off 2nd storey balconies, so it didn't surprise me to hear in the elevator that someone had been making a racket that sounded like long, drawn-out gunfire; what surprised me was that when I heard when it had happened, I realized that the noise was me, doing the flamenco in high heels in the bathtub.

Jen T. (that's me) said...

I just like to point my laser pointer at people's foreheads and chests. Heheheheeee.