Thursday, October 28, 2004

Road Rage

I drive with a consistenly low level of road rage at all times so it doesn't take much for my low level rage to escalate and present itself mostly in the form of gutter mouth. Since I'm usually in the car by myself, I let the colorful epithets flow freely and with great delight. The problem is that when people are riding with me, I still find myself talking, cajoling and cursing the other drivers who ARE ALL IN MY WAY and TRYING TO KILL ME. Since I'm generally a low-key, Type B personality, my passengers are quite shocked to see such behavior from me if they haven't ridden with me before.

I want to share with you my method of really letting off steam at the worst assholes of the road: the "tailgater", the "no turn signal" and the "cutter offer." I shoot them "the finger" but not in the ordinary way which could cause you to become permanently dead at the hands of a "cutter offer." My method for "giving the bird" is to make the usual middle-finger-upward gesture but I do it just below window level. The offending jackass never sees it but it still feels great. Go ahead. Try it. Just remember the important part...below window level...very important.

1 comment:

Julia said...

oh good, I thought I was the only one angry enough to invent a 'below the dash finger'. that's whay I call it when I flip the bird no higher than the dashboard. Sure makes you feel better!