Friday, October 26, 2007

Our house will be a very, very, very fine house

I have lots and lots and lots of women friends and cousins and we love to sit around and eat and drink and gossip and say gross, disgusting, vulgar things all while trying to save the world. Occasionally, we talk about what will happen when, inevitably, our children or husbands or doctors look at us and say, "Dammit woman! That's it!! You've microwaved your last cat. To the home with you!"

Most of us agree that we're actually looking forward to the time when we’re all in the same “home” together. I was telling somebody that the other day. I said that all of my girlfriends and I plan to live in the same home when we get too old to take care of ourselves.

They said, “I hope it’s a big house.”

I said, “Not same HOUSE, same HOME. Big difference.”

A few notes to anyone who plans and builds future "homes" for women like us:
  • We'll play bingo, if you insist, but we also want slot machines and blackjack.
  • We want current music playing on the surround sound system along with the classic rock.
  • High speed internet connections are a must.
  • We'll drink our prune juice but we want a nice Chianti on pasta night and margaritas every Friday.
  • If we want to make a bong out of our of our empty insulin syringes and Fosamax bottles during arts and crafts time, don't give us any shit.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Baby sis:

They'll building a great big new one here in Beaumont. We'll have to get in on the planning. There must be beach vollyball. Only young male players that we can watch to keep our blood flowing.

Can I get an amen? AAAAMEN

Laurie said...

Baby Sis - A to the Men, Little Sister!

Apartment for Peggy said...

Is prune juice good with vodka?

Anonymous said...

All I can say is: What's the address cause I wanna be an occupant! Maybe we could talk one of those volleyball playing guys into subbing as a massage therapist for old and wrinkled bodies:)

Anonymous said...

AMEN sista … I love it …

If we ever win the lottery … I will build “OUR HOME” …

Anonymous said...

I'm in!

Anonymous said...

Me, too!

Laurie said...

Everybody - I've received e-mails saying it should be tropical themed and have jacuzzis in each room. I'm taking notes.

Anonymous said...

Daughter, as you know my class reunion committee has been dining out once a month for 27 years. We usually have between 15 to 25 people each month. We know each other so well we know we could live together. Well we have a very rich classmate, (won't mention names) we are going to give him our plans to build us a T. J. Class of 1954 Mature Adults Party House for classmates and spouse for when we are to old to live alone. We can't wait.

Laurie said...

Mommy - Well, if you and dad insist on living in a "party home" instead of on my couch, I guess there's nothing I can do about it.

Leon said...

nothing to say here!

hehehehe

now im up to date with your posts!

Lorna said...

sister, you have so got a view of my future. Is there a Texan drawl, twang or something that i need to master in the next little while?

Oh, and should i bring my own pool guys?

Anonymous said...

I'm comin' to live in your Home. I'll be having so much fun I won't care that my kids never visit me.

*sophmom ponders the viability of this as a business model*

Anonymous said...

I'm in. When do we get started setting this place up? We don't have that much longer so we need to get started while we can still remember that this is our plan.

Laurie said...

Donna - Excellent! Hahahaha!

Laurie said...

Leon - Excellent!

Lorna - You are welcome, Canadian accent and all, eh. Yes, more pool guys.

Sophmom - We can call it The Old Bloggers Home.

Adela said...

Where do I sign?

I'm not sure if prune juice is good with vodka, but I am sure that vodka is good with everything.

Laurie said...

Adela - Well said!

Grimm said...

Honestly, did you learn to make that bong on YouTube or was it Bob Vila?

Laurie said...

Grimm - Neither. Martha Stewart. She learned it in the joint...excuse the pun.