Why yesterday was a bad day

First the dog who usually barely makes it out the door without pooping when I walk him in the morning took forever and I had to walk him for fifteen minutes which caused me to run late then when I opened my new pack of contacts I couldn't remember which contact went into which eye so instead of reading the box I tried to put them in anyway and put them in the wrong eye and couldn't see anything so I took the one out of my right eye and put it back into the contact lens container and took the other one out of my left eye but dropped it on the counter and when I bent over to pick it up I noticed that the other contact lens didn't go into the case at all but I had also dropped it on the counter so now I was all confused again because both contacts were sitting on the counter so I rinsed them off and put them in my eyes and I could see but my left eye felt like it had a pebble in it but since I was running late because of the constipated dog I just left it in and figured I would take it out and rinse it off when I got to the office but when I got to the office and took it out and rinsed it off it still hurt so I decided to just take the lenses out but I realized that although I have three hundred and fifty empty contact lens cases at home I have none at my office or in my purse so I went to the bathroom to put the contact lens back in my eye so I could drive to CVS and buy a new case because I can't drive with only one contact lens but forgot I had been eating jalapeno pistachios (see previous post) and burnt the hell out of my left eye but since they were new contacts I wasn't about to just throw them away since I didn't have a case so I put them back into my eyes (OUCH) and drove to CVS with burning eyes to get a contact lens case and I brought my glasses with me so I could take the contacts out as soon as I got back into my car with the new case but I had forgotten the contact lens solution back at the office and since I didn't want to go back into CVS to buy more solution I drove back to my office with burning eyes and finally got back to my office with a new contact lens case and took the f.u.c.k.e.r.s out.

The End.