Thursday, March 08, 2007

I hate...

...dentists and gynocologists. Of course, I had a dentist appointment yesterday and, if I had to choose, I would take my yearly gyno exam over my twice yearly dental exam any day.

As Jen puts it, both of these docs fall into the same category: people who cause pain in an "in-hole."

I especially hate it when the dentist talks to me when my mouth is full of stuff that he put in there. I also don't care for the inevitable awkward moment when the gyno tries to make small talk while kneading my boobs or gazing deeply into my hootch-a-rama.

Seriously, there is nothing you guys can say that would make me not want to stab you with a hand-sharpened toothbrush or beat you about the head with a cold speculum.

13 comments:

Jen T. (soon to be E.) said...

We always discuss such interesting topics.

Laurie said...

Jen - I've said it before, I'll say it again, we're some classy chicks.

Serena Joy said...

I hate both kinds of exams, too. Neither one is much of an occasion for small talk.

Laurie said...

Serena Joy - I, of course, totally agree.

La Sirena said...

I'll take the dentist over the gynecologist -- but they both suck.

Nothing like strange fingers and cold KY under flourescent lights to make your skin crawl. It always reminds me of Scully's abduction and impregnation on "The X Files". In fact, I make them talk so I can make sure I'm NOT in the midst of an abduction. :-l

Word verif = objin

Susan in St. Paul said...

Gynos are easy to kick, really, even when you don't intend to ;-)
just saying...

Susan in St. Paul said...

I forget dentists:
I don't mind them, but I don't like what they do, especially fillings, crowns and root canals. I don't even like the xrays.

When I was a kid I had a great one who used to call me Mabel. One day he told me that he wouldn't be my dentist for a while because he had become addicted to drugs, he explained how it happened and everything. He was going for treatment. He did this as he was doing a filling. It all seemed so reasonable and logical to me, I think I was 9. When I came out and explained it to my mom, she just about flipped!

Mine current one isn't so bad. He shows me magic tricks with dental dams, tells me really bad jokes-so I am not tempted to laugh, and strange stories. His bests ones have to do with really serious subjects like death, neo nazi conversions, and cancer. Once while we were waiting for the Novocaine to kick in and he started a religious debate with me and his new assistant who was Muslim.
For long drawn out reasons he thinks his mother has been reincarnated as a wild turkey and I can't see one without thinking there is Dr.X's mother.

Gnightgirl said...

I hate dentists too. If all that scraping and digging isn't enough, they have to tip that chair back so far that you're standing on your head for 30 minutes. I've learned to take Advil BEFORE I go in.

Laurie said...

La Sirena - HAHAHAHA! I can't believe the word verifier! That's just weird.

Susan - Don't think I haven't considered it.

Susan - That's wild!!

Gnight Girl - I really need to get my hands on some valium.

Grimm said...

Guess this is a subject us male shouldn't comment on.

Oops.

Laurie said...

Grimm - That would be best.

TexasGal said...

Ok! I'm just LMAO at the word "hootch-a-rama"! My co-workers thing there's something wrong with me...they can't see why I sit here and laugh for no reason.

Laurie said...

Texas Gal - I love to think I'm making other people look silly in their offices! Thanks for that. :)