Friday, August 04, 2006

In Laurie's Brain...Vacation Tips

Before I hit the road for a couple of days, below are a few vacation tips I made up for you.

You might want to cancel your reservations if...

…your children (especially the teenagers) are way too happy you’re leaving.

…two days before you leave, your beachfront hotel calls to give you a free upgrade if you promise you aren’t the evacuatin’ type.

…you just saw your hotel on the television program America’s Scariest Most Gruesomely Haunted Unexplained Hotels.

…you Google toxic dump and your destination city is the number one hit.

…your parents are way too happy you’re leaving.

…you have to cancel a semester of college and two surgeries to cover the cost.

…your reservation confirmation letter is handwritten…in crayon.

…your airline can’t afford security so they have a “Bring Your Own Weapon” policy.

…your boss is way too happy you’re leaving.

…Anthony Bourdain won’t even eat there.

…veteran embedded reporters are begging to tag along saying they’ll bring their own flak jackets.


Sophmom said...

Have a great trip, Laurie! You forgot, "Your spouse is way too happy you're leaving!"

Laurie said...

Sophmom - Oh, my! It's been so long since I've been married, I forgot about that one. That should have been number one, huh? :)

Donna said...

These are priceless! Mind if I link to them? (Have a great trip!)

Laurie said...

Donna - Of course you can link to them! I wasn't getting many comments on this one so I was afraid they weren't as funny as I thought they were. :)

My name is Laurie. I am a comment addict.

Sylvana said...

I think I stayed there once.

Lorna said...

...if there's a guy in a black ski mask with a gymbag full of tools skulking around your backyard

cindybindy said...

"...If the town council of the town you're visiting offers to pay your way." Hope you have a great trip and a fun time. Cindy

Nomad said...

Laurie I got your message , a bit late,but it is my fault (I just had a look at my moderate box)

as far french lessons or corrections, it is Ok, a pleasure !

Laurie said...

Sylvana - Haven't we all?!

Lorna - I stayed there, too.

Cindy - Actually, if anyone offers to pay my way, I'm there. :)

Nomad - Great! :)