Saturday, April 21, 2007

How to NOT Pick Up Men at the Supermarket



While I was bored out of my mind at the beach after everyone left me on my own, I kept seeing this ridiculous commercial for individually wrapped prunes. The only thing I can think of nastier than dried up prunes would be consistently juicy prunes. Excuse me while I try to get that taste out of my mouth.

Inspired by this post from G'night Girl, the next time I go to Kroger, I'm going to load my shopping cart with a couple of cans of individually wrapped prunes, three bottles of Clamato and about thirty cans of sardines. Then, I'm going to walk around the store and try to draw attention to my oddly loaded shopping basket.

Why would I do this, you ask? Because that's how I roll.

15 comments:

laura1814 said...

Did you know that prune juice is why Dr. Pepper tastes so disgusting?

Jen T. (soon to be E.) said...

Once in high school, some friends of mine and I went to WalMart (I think it was after prom, because we all had on formal gowns and tuxes in my memory...). Each of us picked up a different and totally unrelated item. Saran wrap, shave gel, bananas, and sauer kraut...(there were more but I can't remember all of them.) We kind of freaked out the cashier, I think. :)

Laurie said...

Laura - I love Dr. Pepper!!!!!!!!

Jen - That's hilarious! I shall add sauerkraut to my basket of tricks.

LoryKC said...

LOL!
Hmmm...I'm not a fan of Dr. Pepper but never knew why. The things you learn online! ;)

Lorna said...

I am a lover of almost every fuit known in its dried condition---except bananas, which are horrible in any condition, and mine are usually in a disgusting one---but here's a reason to eat prunes, other than the obvious one: One of my friends swears that somebody like Dr Weil promises that one prune and 7 soy nuts will ward off Alzheimers. Or was that 7 prunes and 1 soy nut, or one soy prune? I can't quite remember....

neil said...

The Polish have a prune dipped in chocolate that is really popular, but I guess if you don't like the flavour, that's not going to sway you, maybe the French thing of soaking them in Cognac might change you're mind...after three or four you might not care that you don't like them.

Laurie said...

Lory - I had no idea so many people didn't like Dr. Pepper.

Lorna - Hahahaha! I'll take my changes.

Neil - I'll take my Cognac pruneless, thank you.

Anonymous said...

How about a way to pickup men or at least get them talking. The times I get approached the most is when I have a sports shirt on. One of the last times Dallas went to the Super Bowl I had to stop by the store. No makeup mind you and I believe I had my glasses on but, I also had on a Roger Starbauch jersey. Men were starting conversations all over the place. This weekend mom and I had to go to Home Depot. I had on my Astro's Lance Berkman t-shirt on. These 2 guys actually fought over helping me and mom. The guy that didn't win still stayed around and talked baseball with me....But then again...maybe they thought my sexual preferences were the same as theirs...mmmm...maybe this isn't a good idea.

Never mind

Baby sis

Laurie said...

Baby Sis - Damn! I shouldn't have given Cory my Dallas Cowboy's jersey from my Major Award Easter Basket.

Susan in St. Paul said...

I won't mention the type of men you might pick up with that shopping cart, or rather I won't mention what their interests might be.

Recently I have notice that men talk to women with dogs, esp if they are men who are into dogs and the dog is some sort of mixture. Unfortunately they seem mainly into the dog. I notice this a lot as I walk around the lake near my house.

I watch one yesterday talk to a women who was sitting on the ground with a cute puppy. He didn't even seem to notice that the straps of her sun dress had fallen or that the way she sat was exposing her underwear. I found it highly amusing, I had my camera, I should have taken a picture. They would have both thought I was taking it of the puppy.

I guess the reverse is true, you could ask a guy about his dog. Though if it was me I would be tempted to ask if they slept with their dog...

I think masses of feminine hygiene products, esp pads and some yeast infection meds are the best way not to pick up men.

Laurie said...

Susan - I wish I had a lake to walk around. That would be nice.

Susan in St. Paul said...

You are always welcome to walk around our local lake, or take of one from here, we have lots of them, at least 10,000.

Our lakes tend to have paths for walkers/runners and a separate one for bikes and roller blades. the separate ones only go one way.

It is nice walking around the lake, sometimes there are interesting sights, yesterday I saw an egret standing and then flying! Last week I saw and heard an accordion player.

Laurie said...

Susan - Cool!

Gnightgirl said...

If anyone asks about your basket, tell them you're trying out a new smoothie recipe.

Laurie said...

Maybe I'll say it's for a homemade hair conditioner.