Friday, August 29, 2008


As a coastal dweller, when a hurricane is headed toward the Gulf of Mexico my brain begins to split into several pieces. The biggest part of my brain doesn't want the hurricane to go towards my little piece of the gulf coast and fuck up my life for weeks or months or, possibly, years.

However, there's another part of my brain that feels bad when I realize that wishing the storm doesn't hit me equals wishing it will hit someone else. I justify my wishing the storm on others by knowing that they are also wishing the storm on me. Bastards.

Then, I also have a part of my brain that enjoys the anticipation of the small storms so I can miss a day or two of work and hang out with family and friends watching the wind and the rain. Of course, when the small storm turns into a big storm I feel guilty for having accidentally willed the big sunovabitch into existence.

I also have a mental double standard when it comes to weathermen. If the forecasted path of a hurricane is away from me, then I think the weatherman is a genius. However, if the path looks like it's headed straight toward my front door, then all weathermen are assholes and don't know what they're talking about. I believe in staying in denial as long as possible.

Hurricane? I don't see no stinkin' hurricane.


ms. e said...

Hurri-schizo-cania treatment should be covered by medical insurance. I hate this feeling.

Anonymous said...

Baby sis:
Something else non-coastal people should know. Panicking people at Wallymart can be a real pain in the ass. And just try to find a dog kennel. I have one, thank God, I just thought I'd get a bigger one. Everybody is either driving way too fast or way too slow. No matter what it equals a real pain in the ass. Top that off with splurging on a whopper only to get home and cray bitch gave you a dry ass chicken sandwich instead.

Susan in St. Paul said...

Someone told me it was only going to be a smallish one, and so they could have a week off from work, so if it turns into a big one you guys can share the guilt with everyone else thinking the same way ;-)

As much as I would like you guys to have some fun time off work, I hope the storm goes away before it hit there.

That is too baby Baby Sis, I would take that sandwich back or take a pic of the sandwich and the receipt and hit the manager for a whopper next time.
Never heard the expression "cray bitch" before, sounds pretty cool. What does it mean, the "cray" part?

Rebecca Hickman said...

Stay safe! My husband's Beaumont relatives are on their way to Dallas.

Anonymous said...

Susan: Category 4 is hardly "smallish." And I think she meant "crazy." Like the person that told you it was going to be "smallish."

Susan in St. Paul said...

trying again

Wow! No idea a Category 4 was expected to hit there, Lots of stuff happening here, so any non-local, non-DNC, non-fair news is kind of slow right now.
I suppose that this is what Laurie meant by a small storm turning into a big storm.

Oh Rats! I already knew that word.

Yep, well, that person also thinks they can control the weather, among other things...

Here is hoping it doesn't come ashore at all.

Susan in St. Paul said...

"US Republicans say their convention in Minnesota next week could be suspended as the storm roars ashore.

John McCain, due to be nominated as the party's presidential election candidate, said the decision would depend on the storm's impact."

I guess it will hit our news soon now.

George said...

If you evacuate, pack a laptop so we can still enjoy our blog. Those of us inland don't want to be inconvenienced.

Jack said...

Sam's was curiously free of people stocking up on hurricane supplies this afternoon. I wonder if that's because everyone's leaving, or because everyone's decided it's not going to amount to much here.

Laurie said...

Ms. E - I agree.

Baby Sis - Chicken serving bastards.

Susan - I didn't even notice the "cray." Crazy was implied, I guess.

Rebecca - We might end up in Dallas, too.

Anonymous - "Smallish" would have been nice.

Susan - "That Person" promised me he'd turn the storm back into a "smallish" storm before it hits land.

Susan - Wow! I hadn't heard that, yet. Postponing the convention is pretty major.

George - Your wish is my command. I did buy a laptop. However, it was a result of my TJHS Alumni addiction more than my blogging addiction. I have a problem.

Jack - I would say Sam's atmosphere is a pretty good indication of the mind set of Beaumont. That's a promising sign maybe.

Susan in St. Paul said...

lets hope that promise holds.

LoneStarLass said...

Now the asshole weathermen are going to get to scare us all next week with Hanna, Ike, and Josephine. You should hear ms. e's daddy yelling at the tv. Gives grumpy old men a good name!

The SciGuy blog at the Houston Chronicle says we can just about call it a season after Rita's anniversary - only 3 hurricanes have ever hit after Sep. 24th.

It's going to be a long 3 weeks.

Laurie said...

Susan - Yep.

Lone Star Lass - I love Ms. E's dad (and you, too!). I hope Ms. E fared okay in Baton Rouge. Much as I don't like cold weather, I'm going to start praying for cold fronts. That seems to help, too.

LoneStarLass said...

Thanks, Laurie! I hope you know we love you, too!

Just talked to Ms. E about an hour ago (1 p.m Tuesday). They have a leaning fence, possible leak in the roof, but all the shingles are still attached. Other than that, nothing they can see.

I did have to tell her that early Sunday morning her great-grandmother, great-aunt, great-uncle and cousin and husband were all hit by a drunk driver in The Woodlands early Sunday morning while evacuating. (Waited until today due to not wanting to pile stress upon more stress for her.) All are okay - our cousin is in ICU in Houston though, less her spleen and with liver abrasions, looking at a 6 week recovery at the least. The older people (my uncle will be 94 next week, my grandmother is 90, and my aunt 88) are all in the hospital waiting to see which rehabilitation facility they can get into. Our cousin’s husband may have a broken hand. We're just thankful they are alive. The driver was arrested on the scene.

I'm praying for cold weather, too.

Susan in St. Paul said...

Lone Star Lass and Ms E- I am so sorry to hear about the accident. I hope everyone recovers quickly.

Laurie said...

Lone Star Lass - I'm so sorry! Please keep me posted.

LoneStarLass said...


My two brothers, sis-in-law and I went over and visited today with all four who are in the hospital. My grandmother is greatly improved, and so are my great-aunt and great-uncle. Lots of bruises still, and broken ribs. But my grandmother will never live on her own again. We're not even sure at this point if she will ever walk again. She was barely walking when this happened. My great-uncle cannot walk on his own anymore, either. We hope he'll regain his strength, but at 94 we don't know.

My cousin is the worst of all. I can't describe how we found her in ICU today. She is really fighting to hang onto life. She has other medical conditions that she was having therapy for before this wreck. I don't know what the long term prognosis is for her. To see such a sweet, smart, funny person like her be reduced to a mass of tubes and monitors is disheartening.

They all need our prayers, but especially my cousin. Thanks for sending them out to us all.

Laurie said...

Lone Star Lass - Just awful.