Saturday, June 07, 2008

Who's the dumbass now?

My New Favorite Chinese Restaurant

First things first. There's a new Chinese restaurant in town and it delivers. When we called in our order from the office, they said, "Twenty minutes." We had about five orders and we're way across town from the restaurant, so we were doubtful. Sure enough, twenty minutes later, we had some of the best Chinese food I've ever eaten.

"Twenty Minutes"

Tonight, I called and placed an order and they said, "Twenty minutes." I always give additional instructions to food delivery people because my townhouse is hard to find. Delivery guys and girls always have to call me because they can't find my house. The lady who took my order, however didn't speak English very well and I could hear someone in the background telling her what questions to ask. So, I decided I would wait for the inevitable call from whoever was sent out with my Mongolian Three Delight and House Special Egg Foo Young.

About twenty minutes later, I thought I heard my gate. I got up to look out the front window to see if anyone was there and I heard the delivery guy standing at my front door shouting, "Hello! Hello!" I was amazed that someone who was not fluent in English and didn't know how to work a doorbell had found my house so quickly.

Who's the Dumbass Now?

I paid the guy and closed the door and thought, "Man, I can't wait to blog that a guy was standing at my door shouting instead of ringing the doorbell." Then, I thought, "I bet the battery in the doorbell button is dead." Sure enough, no juice going to the doorbell. My apologies to the Asian guy who delivered my dinner for thinking you were a dumbass.

So, I walked to my battery place, grabbed a tiny battery and put it in the doorbell button contraption. Still no juice. Crap. I pulled the battery out and there was some green stuff on the connections. I cleaned that off, put the battery back in and thought, "Now, where did I put the top?" I searched for the damn top all over my kitchen...under paper towels...under dish towels...on the floor...on the island...nothing. After lots of cussing and hell raising, I realized that I had the top in my hand.

Again, I apologize to the Asian guy who delivered my dinner. I am the dumbass.

Jo Jo's China Bistro (same strip as the new Kroger and Buffalo Wild Wings)
3939 Dowlen Road, Suite 16
Beaumont, Texas 77706
Telephone: 409-892-9119
Telephone: 409-892-9229

All Day Delivery ($15 minimum)


Jack said...

Something about that map doesn't look right to me.

Laurie said...

Jack - It's missing a few side streets and they've done some major road relocation of Dowlen Road, haven't they?

Laurie's Mom said...

In defence of my "Dumbass Daughter", you had been out all day in the hot sun working for a Great Cause. Sister Bonnie said it was commented that you had a great "Rest Stop" for the bikers in the fund raiser. You can now call yourself a "Smart Dumbass".

Laurie said...

Mom - Aw, thanks. :)

Just a Plane Ride Away said...

Oh dear... Hahaha! I'm sure it was just heat stroke.

Jack said...

It wasn't the lack of side streets so much as the fact that they seem to have put Wal-Mart, Kroger, and HEB on the wrong side of 69/96. Or, if you rotate the map to get them on the correct side of 69/96, they're on the wrong side of Dowlen.

Susan in St. Paul said...

Very Cool! Delivery in Beaumont! Great for all nighters.

I won't trust their maps though.

Susan in St. Paul said...

What is HEB?

Laurie-They need to hire you to do a paint map!

Laurie said...

Just - Thanks for the vote of confidence. :)

Jack - If you move Dowlen from behind (below on the map) WalMart/Kroger/HEB and put it in front of (above on the map), then Dowlen is in the proper place and between WalMart/Kroger/HEB and the post office.

Hwy 69/96 is to the left of Dowlen(perpendicular on the map), which is the correct location. If you imagine that Delaware and Folsom are south (to the right of the map)of Kroger, then WalMart and Hwy 69/96 would be north (to the left of the map).

Susan - Anyone who lives in Beaumont will be able to find it even with the less than accurate map. Everyone knows where Kroger is.

Susan - HEB is a grocery store and I did consider doing an MSPaint map, but I didn't want Jack to think I was being a smart ass.

Bmt Queen of Quite A Lot said...

Try the Mongolian Chicken...very spicy and abso-freakin-lutely delish! (As an aside, the name apparently is a little offsetting to some. The boyfriend, having been born in Eunice and still living in LA, said the name made as much sense as "Thibodeaux's Tex Mex House"!) Also, I wish my firm participated in the JCBA/JCYLA events. I just may have to try to become a step-employee next time.

Jack said...

If you're travelling in a northeasterly direction on 69/96 and turn left on to Dowlen, you'll pass the mall, then Wal-Mart, then Kroger, then HEB, all of which will be on your right as you travel in an easterly and/or southerly direction down Dowlen.

If you look at the map, you'll see that if you make a left turn on to Dowlen from 69/96, you'll pass Wal-Mart, Kroger, and HEB, in the right order, but they'll be on the left side of the road, where Lowe's, Pablano, and Pei Wei should be (in that order, at least).

Please see the satellite image/map with JoJo's address marked:

For the benefit of our out-of-town guests, HEB is that big building on the northeast corner of Dowlen and Delaware.

Who's the dumbass now? :-)

Laurie said...

Jack - If you'll look back to my previous attempt at reading the map, I said that IF you move the line for Dowlen Road as drawn on the map to BETWEEN Walmart, Kroger, HEB and the post office, the map is correct.

The map correctly shows the post office on the same side of the road as Lowes, IF you move the line which is supposed to represent Dowlen road.

Anais said...

I called JoJo's to have an order delivered and they told me that I lived too close. I stay off of Hwy 105, I told the lady that the onky thing the menu said is 15 minimum and she said it had to be greater than 5 miles distance..that's dumbass'ed

Laurie said...

Anais, that's just about the craziest thing I've ever heard. Weird!

Dianna said...

Dunno how I came across this post so long after its inception but I think it involved Google (what the hell doesn't involve Google these days) and the word Chinese. I was reading it to my husband and he thinks I have found my long lost twin that actually doesn't exist and thus I have never looked for. Funny as hell though and while we like their food too (although I've converted to Pei Wei now…but I still call it Pee Wee)…I would be a total skeptic too. We've had issues trying to convey easier messages than geographical location…like I'm drinking water, not tea. Jesus I about tried drawing out the chemical compound to see if that would translate!