Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Do you need a basket?

Yesterday, a co-worker asked if I had a Sam's card. "Why, of course," says I.

"In fact," I said, "I'm running low on bubble gum, so I'll stop by tonight."

I supply bubble gum to everybody at the firm. It makes you smarter. Google it.

When I got to Sam's, I thought, "I don't need a basket. I'm only getting two things."

We all know where this is going.

When I got to the very back of the store, with my arms full of crap, I realized I had no more arms to carry the one thing I had actually gone to Sam's to buy. So, I marched myself all the way back to the front of the store, with every intent of stealing someone's empty basket while they weren't looking. I finally found an unattended basket in office supplies, unloaded my aching arms and headed back to the rear of the store for my friend's item.

Moral of the story: Never say "no" to the basket lady at Sam's.

My "must have" purchases:

  • 1 big ass roasted chicken
  • 1 Turbo Tax software
  • 1 100 ml bottle of Olay Regenerist
  • 48 Nutri-Grain bars
  • 360 pieces of Dubble Bubble bubble gum
  • 500 5 oz bathroom cups
  • 120 Glad tall kitchen garbage bags

I bought 1,031 things. No wonder I needed a basket.

8 comments:

Zina said...

DOUBLE BUBBLE? The good stuff is Super Bubble (in the yellow, red and blue wrappers.) Much softer. My friend Kristy gave me a bucket of bubble gum after both surgeries. Helps get rid of the yucky medicine taste.

Rebecca Hickman: said...

How do you like the Olay? I'm afraid to try it because everything makes me break out. I always knew I'd end up having wrinkles and pimples at he same time!

Just a Plane Ride Away said...

Ok, I do that too. And sometimes, when I remember, I grab one of those plastic hand baskets and manage to make that too heavy or overflow with things that don't stay in like giant chip bags or baguettes that break in half.

TexasGal said...

I miss SAM's and Wal-Mart and Target and .... Here you learn not to buy more than you can carry. Nothing is convenient. All the grocery stores are in shopping malls where you have to park in a parking garage. So you have to carry what you bought back to your car if you are lucky enough to drive. Otherwise it has to go with you in a taxi, on the bus or MRT. Luckily I have a car here. But once I get it home I have to carry it all up the elevator to our condo.

neil said...

I must be seriously unhygenic, having no idea what a bathroom cup is and why would you be needing 500 of them. My mind is boggling!

Leon J. de la Garza said...

It usually happens to me too..
When i don't "need" a basket.. i end up carrying a whole lot of crap.
Although i must say, i don't think I've ever left a wal-mart/sams/whatever with literally a thousand things..

Record Set.
Congrats.

Grimm said...

Whoa 360 pieces of Double Bubble would only last me about a day and a half.

And give me about 15 chipped teeth.

BTW, you have something to pick up over at my site.

Laurie said...

Zina - I like the Dubble Bubble better.

Rebecca - I love the Olay products!!!

Just... - When I'm at CVS or Walgreen's, the aisles are so narrow, I always grab the hand baskets and overload them. Then I end up carrying the big stuff PLUS the basket. Hahahaha!!

Texas Gal - Oh, that sounds like a nightmare!!

Neil - Oh, it's not that interesting. They're just tiny paper drinking cups to rinse your mouth after brushing your teeth and taking your vitamins. :)

Leon - Thanks!! I don't think I've ever set a record before. :)

Grimm - I WON A MAJOR AWARD!!!!