The following stories were on the national news tonight and were presented with great emotion and oh so serious faces.
1. People with bad credit who were given home loans are defaulting on those loans in record numbers.
Why is this a surprise? They even did a segment on how to avoid foreclosure. A whole segment? Barring tragic circumstances, I can wrap up avoiding foreclosure in one sentence: Borrowers, don't borrow more money than you make and lenders, don't loan outrageous amounts of money to people with bad credit.
2. Terrorists are planning to attack the United States.
Yes. Yes, they are. This is what they do. This is the only thing they do. They blow things up and they plan to blow things up.
3. Alberto Gonzales might have committed perjury.
Might have? Might have? Alberto Gonzales can't even tell the truth convincingly.
3. (a) Oh, and by the way, the president stands behind him. That's another little "no shit" moment on the nightly news for you.
4. Cat is harbinger of death.
Okay, this one was good. To watch the video, click here.