Thursday, May 27, 2010

I Think the Mayans Were Right

Every day I read something on that makes me think I'm in the middle of a 1950s horror movie or speeding toward those Mayan priests' predicted end of the world...

Livermore, California (CNN) -- Scientists at a government lab here are trying to use the world's largest laser -- it's the size of three football fields -- to set off a nuclear reaction so intense that it will make a star bloom on the surface of the Earth."

Sure.  Why not?  What could possibly go wrong?

"Scientists at the J. Craig Venter Institute have created a synthetic cell that can survive and reproduce itself according to an artificial DNA sequence, promising designer genomes with which researchers can produce sophisticated artificial organisms."

Create new life forms.  That always turns out well.  Ask Dr. Moreau.

Then, there's the whole monster Blob of oil knocking on my southeast Texas back door.  As if The Blob weren't bad enough, the chemicals being used as dispersants to break up the oil don't give me a warm fuzzy feeling either. 

The latest kick in the head concerning The Blob?  Hurricane season starts next week.  CNN has this to say about that:  "Not only is it hard to track how contaminants would be redistributed by a hurricane, but it's also hard to predict how the slick would affect the storm..."  and this, "...other scientists say the storms could be stronger than usual because the black oil would heat the water faster and accelerate formation of hurricanes...."

Add an earthquake every other week, Korea going nuts all over itself, Jesse James, Kate Gosselin and Janet Jackson's weird hairdo last night on American Idol to all of the above and I'd say we've got trouble.  Big trouble.  Ray Harryhausen caliber trouble.

I hope somebody's out there looking for a King Kong to take care of all these Godzillas.


Steve said...

They can make a star and they can't come up with a better fucking plan than "Diet and Exercise?"

Laurie said...

Steve, they also can't clean up millions and millions of gallons of oil spewing into the Gulf of Mexico every day...well, I guess that's a tough one.

"Diet and Exercise?" Yeah! WTF?!

jen said...

There's some kind of accelerator they built in Britain that could cause a black hole, too.

I'm just planning on blowing all my money on booze and junk food for the next two and a half years. Screw diet and exercise if the world's ending, I say.

Lorna said...

Hello...I've been missing you. And by the way, France was wonderful, Jersey was amusing, England everything I'd hoped and Wales just about did me in.

Lorna said...

Just caught up on all your May posts, and I have to say: you're one funny lady. Of course if I were there in person, I could use adjectives.