Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Fore-Casting

The good news: The Hobbit is going to be made into a movie.
The bad news: Peter Jackson won’t be directing.

Fore-Casting…(if these guys directed):

Quentin Tarantino
Bilbo Baggins – Joe Pesci
Gandalf – John Travolta
Gollum – Christopher Walken

Stephen Spielberg
Bilbo Baggins – Danny DeVito
Gandalf – Sean Connery
Gollum – William Shatner

Tim Burton
Bilbo Baggins – Christina Ricci
Gandalf – Johnny Depp
Gollum – Beetle Juice

Clint Eastwood
Bilbo Baggins – Gene Hackman
Gandalf – Clint Eastwood
Gollum – Clyde the Orangutan

Spike Lee
Bilbo Baggins – Whoopie Goldberg
Gandalf – Morgan Freeman
Gollum – Wanda Sykes

Rob Reiner
Bilbo Baggins – Billy Crystal
Gandalf – Tom Hanks
Gollum – Gilbert Gottffied

Mel Gibson
Bilbo Baggins - Jesus
Gandalf - God
Gollum – Satan

10 comments:

  1. What an accurate reflection of all those directors. I especially love Mel Gibson's list, bet he could get all of them to work for him, maybe the devil all ready does.

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  2. All I can say is that you NAILED it. Very well done - had me cracking up throughout.

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  3. I'd go and see them all Laurie, I think Mel may have gone for a slightly more Jewish cast though.

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  4. BAHAHA. This is perfect. Dead on, I say.

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  5. Neil, Grimm, Peter and Jen - Thanks. :)

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  6. Oh this was hilarious, especially the Mel Gibson one! Too, too funny!

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  7. Man, I was sure Joe Pesci was dead. Maybe it's just that he hasn't made an actual movie in this century. I could kinda see him in dual roles. He could play Bilbo and Gollum. Twice the Oscar buzz!

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  8. could we get a write-in thing going on Mel's version? Is there a part for Mary Magdalene

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  9. Poker Boss - I need to do a Scorsese one:

    Bilbo: Sharon Stone
    Gandalf: Robert DeNiro
    Gollum: Joe Pesci

    Lorna - Perhaps she could be the all-knowing narrator.

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